I hear words go past me backwards.

God, it better fucking not be, and Effy sighed deeply as she made a move to extricate herself. Pity they hadn't been in his room. Really she had no leg to stand on trying to get him to answer her door.

"Shit." She was going to have to get up. Whoever that was? Noisy.

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Joshua pressed his ear to the door, listening for any sounds that he was being heard. He could hear movement so that was something at least. Instead of screaming, he kept up the kicking and added in some banging with one small fist.

He wasn't going to be deterred or ignored, apparently. He wanted that door to get opened.

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"Just make them go away," he told her, giving some sleepy advice and moving his arms and legs so she could get out of the bed a little easier. "And come back."

Of course, he was already closing his eyes again, settling back into that doze so his advice was a little smug. She was probably used to that.

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Pretty well used to that, yeah. Enough just to mutter under her breath as she forced herself out of bed and into the search for clothes.

She wasn't about to open that door as she was. Not that dozy. "Yeah, I'll be there," assured whoever was there.

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"Well, hurry," said the voice from the other side of the door. Come on, he liked getting what he wanted and he couldn't very well get it when he couldn't even see his parents.

Joshua started actually pulling at the knob now, trying to force his way into the room a little quicker since Effy was moving slowly.

"I haven't got all day," he muttered, kicking the door for good measure. "God."

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Alex was proving himself no help, rolling onto his stomach and sort of stealing her pillow since it was still warm from her and he could press his face into it and keep dozing.

Real big help, he was.

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Yeah, big fucking help. Especially since she couldn't find a damn shirt, and was going to end up stealing his in a minute.

It took a moment longer for the voice itself to filter through and register as young. Really, really young. That was enough to spur her to just grab whatever was closest to throw on to open the door.

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"It's about damn time," Joshua said, peering up at Effy with big eyes and looking a little miffed that he'd been kept waiting so long.

Without waiting for an invitation, he shouldered his way into the room because he wast meant to be there and he was bored just knocking.

"Think you could've kept me waiting any longer, Mom?" he asked, making a face. "It was like forever, God."

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Alex really wished he'd been paying more attention especially at the first utterance of the word 'Mom' because he was sure the reaction would be great.

Instead, he was stretching a bit on the bed, trying to block out the noise and maybe make it go away with the power of his mind.

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Yeah, he'd probably sad to have missed the supreme 'what the fuck?' look.

"... What?"

See how she left off the 'the fuck?' part out loud. Wasn't that good of her?

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"What part didn't you hear?" Joshua asked, sighing frustratedly. "I didn't stutter. Anyway, I'm here now. I want to do something."

Pushy pushy.

"Where's Dad?" Well, he answered his own question when he glanced at the bed. "Still sleeping? Wake him up."

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"You really kind of suck at making people go away," Alex said, not moving at all but deciding to let that sentiment be known since it was true and he could hear the two voices and all.

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Effy couldn't quite suppress the eyeroll at that comment. "You're such a help." It was easier to focus on that, than the kid calling her 'mom'.

"Think you're a bit lost," Effy directed at the kid. Lost, and really confused, because she was no-one's mom, thanks. Didn't really think she ever would be.

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"Oh, get off it," Joshua said, matching Effy's eyeroll with one of his own. "You know I'm your kid. I'd hug you and shit but that's gross."

Ew, hugging.

"I'm not lost. You should get Dad -- " he said, pointing to the bed, " -- up so we can do something that isn't boring. Twister. We could play Twister and I could kick your asses."

Mostly because he cheated like crazy.

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Well, it wasn't like Alex could stay asleep forever and now he was coming round, rolling over and sitting up, still looking dazed but somewhat alert.

"What the fuck's the kid doing here?" he asked, glancing at Effy. "You got another brother or something?"

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"See? Awake." And apparently not hearing the 'Dad' portion of this. Effy felt a headache coming on, and she'd barely been up for two minutes.

"And no." That part went to Alex. "Just the one. He's not it."

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"I'm not her brother, I'm your kid," Joshua said, wondering if his parents had just gone mental overnight or something. They were starting to bore him with all these looks and incessant questions.

"Have you both gone mental or something?" he asked, just deciding to voice that question. "Stop acting like you don't know who I am. It's not funny."

And, even if Joshua didn't hug (ew), he was going to reach up and try and grab Effy's hand to see if he could force to stop gawking and stuff. "Come on, Mom. I wanna do something that's not staring at walls."

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All right, now Alex was all the way awake and staring at both of them. Why had he woken up again? This wasn't fucking happening.

"The fuck?" Still staring. "No. No, I'm not your dad. I don't even know your name. How can I be your dad if I don't know your name."

And and and... He grimaced and pointed towards Effy. "And we use fucking protection. I don't even know your name."

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"Don't look at me. I don't know it either." Because, what she'd failed to do somewhere in this so far was deny. He was all... unnervingly familiar, and it had her pausing.

"And I'm not mental." She wasn't!

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"You're acting like it," he scoffed, still tugging on her hand for...no other reason than to get her to stop standing there, looking lost. She hadn't had to climb three flights of stairs to find him. He was the one that had nearly been lost.

"Joshua Aaron Karev," he said, having recited that name far too many times. Boring name, if you asked him. Boring. "I want Pop Tarts for breakfast. I want Dad to make them. His aren't shit like yours, Mom."

Obviously, he had a Pop Tart preference. Pop Tarts just brought people together.

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Alex would have gotten out of bed but, you know, he wasn't wearing anything but the sheet right now so he thought it better to stay put and sta--

"Wait, Aaron?" Alex asked sharply, staring a little harder than he had been before. That was an all too familiar name attached to his last name and his expression betrayed that familiarity for a brief moment before he looked down. "She's not mental. I'm not mental. You're the one that thinks we're parents, you're the mental one."

Arguing with a child. That's the spirit.

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Wasn't it just. Not only was he arguing, he was also telling the kid he was crazy. Such parenting.

Still, that hesitation was noticeable enough to prompt a look from Effy.

"It's just... not possible." Because she would've noticed, obviously. Then again, nothing around here fell in the realm of 'impossible' all of the time, which worried her a little. "I am not parent material." At all. Ever.

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"Yeah, yeah and Dad's an idiot and blah blah blah," Joshua mimicked, obviously having heard a version of this argument before. He wasn't letting go of Effy's hand though, small fingers tightening around hers.

"Can you stop acting weird?" he finally asked, sighing. "I don't like it when you're weird. Obviously, it's possible. I could tell you how I came here, if you want. I know how."

Smart, oversharing kid, that was him. No shame. It was an inherited gene.

"You were probably doing that last night," he decided, looking smirky. "Weren't you?"

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Alex just shook his head at that look, not willing to get into anything right here and now considering they were dealing with their kid.

What the fuck.

"You've got a smart mouth." It was really familiar. He looked back at Effy. "Can you like turn him around so I can at least put some fucking pants on? Be...a mom or something."

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